I started with this story of CAS because I am finding it very difficult to deconstruct my life but this is where I’ve decided to start. Molly Fraser. What an important woman in my life, as I cannot say for sure that I know all that I do about my adoption and blood family, if were not for her. Molly was the case worker for my adoption from Children’s Aid Society (CAS) here in Ottawa. I had the opportunity to sit and talk with her after learning about my blood sister, Linda when I was about 17 years old.
I was about 16 years old when my mother told me that I had a blood sister, Linda who was living with her family in Salmon Arm, British Columbia. I’m a little unclear how they got in touch with Molly, but they had reached out to CAS to see if Linda had any blood relatives. Although I was not of age, Molly and my mother had developed a friendship over the years so Molly reached out to my mother as a friend. Molly, my mother, and Linda’s mother began a conversation as to how to approach telling Linda and I about each other, and I believe it took almost of year of going back and forth trying to find the right time to tell us both. I remember the day clearly.
We had just finished dinner and my mother took out a family photo and asked if I recognized anyone in the picture. I saw myself as an adult with people I did not recognize. My mind was really trying to figure out when me, as an adult, could be in a photo with people that I didn’t know. My mother then said that this was my sister. Honesty, we look like identical twins. Having grown up not looking like anyone in my family, to then see someone who was exactly like me was so incredibly exciting. At that moment, we all went to different phones in the house, yes, the days of land lines throughout the house. Within a month or so, I was on a plane to BC!
Back to Molly. We had a very frank conversation about the time when I was put up for adoption. She said my mother had been there before, to give up Linda. Giving me up was extremely difficult, as you can imagine. She came in somewhere between 3 and 5 times before finally leaving me. I cannot imagine the pain for her, Diane, to live through all this alone at a time when being out of wedlock and pregnant had such great stigma.
I often wonder, if my mother and Molly had not become friends, if my meeting Linda would have happened. I do know that I have a brother somewhere and with these writings I am hoping that somehow, I might find him as well.
Linda and I connected for years and then with young families we lost contact. Today, through the ease of social media, I have connected with her again. I try and explain to people the difference between my sisters that I grew up with and Linda. There’s no comparison and no replacing either type of relationship, all so very special to me. There will be lots more to come about Linda, connecting with my family on the reserve and how I was blessed to be raised in a home that encouraged me to learn more.
You are doing a beautiful job telling this story, Chris. Thank you for sharing it. I look forward to reading more..
Thank you so much Tania, I really appreciate your feedback. Hugs, Chris
Wow, what a journey for you Chris. Thank you so much for sharing your story with us.
Thank you for giving us the privilege to hear your story and learn from it. I hope by setting it free it gives you strength and courage to find your way each day.
Thank you for listening Tara ❤️
Thank you for listening Deanna ❤️
I suspect that you’ve been struggling for awhile to share this story. Thank you. I look forward to reading more.
Thanks Diane, indeed I have in some ways and in many just thinking this was life. It was when I shared some of my story, so many said I should write about it, so here I go. Thanks for listening 🙏
Awe thank you for the kind words. You and James are so special to me and appreciate you listening and love hearing all your feedback 🤗
♥️ ♥️♥️♥️ – this is beautifully written. I also look forward to reading more.
Thank you so much Erika, I appreciate your kind words ☺️
Wow. I have known you a very long time, a lifetime it seems and all I have ever seen in you is strength and bravery. To have had a past like you have and stay so strong is something I admire deeply. I have always felt fortunate to call you friend and feel even more strongly about that now. It’s admiring that you are doing this, I know I could never have the strength to do so. I look forward to hearing more and I am here for you if ever you need anything. Your friend always
Sue XO
We have known each other a lifetime and I also consider myself fortunate to call you my friend. Thank you so much for your support and will 100% lean on you when I need to because we’ve always been there for each other XXOO
Thank you so much for sharing. Stories of family are so important. Hugs to you. Fiona
Thank you so much 😊 hugs back
Awe thanks Barb, appreciate your thoughts 🧡